Hunter Biden’s $LAPTOP coin causes ‘bloodbath’ for investors. How to protect yourself

Christy Bieber

Fri, September 11, 2026 at 6:10 PM GMT+3 7 min read

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Over 600,000 new cryptocurrencies were created in just the first days of 2026, according to Binance (1), a digital asset marketplace and crypto exchange. A surprising number of them have come from people in the political realm, including President Trump's $TRUMP coin (2) and the first lady's $MELANIA coin, which was created as part of the Melania Meme (3) project.

Now, a big name from the left side of the aisle has decided to get in on the action. On Sept. 9, Hunter Biden launched his own meme coin (4), $LAPTOP, named for some of the most controversial coverage of the younger Biden during Joe Biden's presidential run.

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The laptop story took off in 2019, when the owner of a repair shop claimed Hunter Biden had abandoned a damaged laptop. The shop owner said the laptop had compromising personal photos and emails describing foreign business deals.

It sparked a firestorm when news media were accused of suppressing details in the lead-up to the election (5).

Fast-forward, and Hunter Biden is using the famous laptop story as a springboard to launch his own crypto coin, having announced its debut early in the week of Sept. 7, with plans to issue a billion tokens.

The tokens were slated to be distributed to the coin's founders, who would receive 30%, as well as to Biden's Substack subscribers and crypto wallet owners who suffered losses on $TRUMP. Subscribers to an Andrew Callaghan-associated mailing list were also eligible.

$LAPTOP tokens issued to the founders were set to be unsellable for six months and to vest over two full years. The plan was to burn some tokens based on criteria like Democrats winning elections, $LAPTOP's price overtaking $TRUMP's price, or Bitcoin reaching an all-time high (6).

Things didn't go as planned. The token's value plummeted within minutes, falling from a peak of $190 per token to less than $2. Unsurprisingly, investors lost big, with blockchain analytics platform Bubblemaps reporting that 80% of investors who had purchased $LAPTOP lost money (7).

In total, an estimated 15,000 traders suffered losses, and the financial damage was so great that Bubblemaps described the launch as a "bloodbath."

For his part, Biden says no one on his team sold $LAPTOP, despite concerns that the token supply was highly concentrated and vulnerable to a rapid sell-off by insiders who could profit off early buyers. He also indicated in an X post that he plans to stick with the coin for the long haul, with the goal of building a community (8).

Biden described the collapse of the token's value as a "sharp swing," which he blamed on technical issues and "predatory snipers," writing that: "This journey is far from over. We built this community for the long game, and that's exactly how we're playing it."

Of course, it remains unclear how many people will want to continue on this journey with him, especially after sustaining such severe losses so soon after making their first investment in the coin. But smart investors still have plenty of alternative assets to diversify into, with stronger track records and a much greater chance of future success.

Here are a few of those alternative assets.

Other crypto

Just because Biden's foray into crypto has — so far — not gone the way he wanted it to, doesn't mean that you have to abandon this asset class entirely. There are other coins and tokens that could warrant consideration if you want to diversify your portfolio.

In fact, American businessman and entrepreneur Robert Kiyosaki has encouraged his followers to invest in tokens such as Bitcoin and Ethereum, claiming to have been stockpiling them for years.

"Since 2012 I have saved Bitcoin," Kiyosaki wrote on X (9). "Since 2022 I have saved Ethereum."

But it's not always easy to know where to start, especially when you're new to the crypto sphere. And you may want to start small.

For instance, if you're looking to diversify beyond traditional stocks and ETFs, Robinhood Crypto lets you buy and sell cryptocurrencies with as little as $1.

With some of the lowest trading costs on average in the U.S., you could end up with up to 2.7% more crypto compared to other platforms.

Robinhood Crypto makes it easy to make investing a habit with recurring buys on a fixed schedule, while giving you access to all your favorite coins — from Bitcoin and Ethereum to Solana, Dogecoin, XRP and more.

You can also transfer crypto securely to other wallets, set custom price alerts, track market trends and manage your portfolio all in one place.

Robinhood ensures the security of your cryptocurrency is a top priority, with the majority of coins held in offline cold storage. Robinhood even carries crime insurance against theft and cyber breaches, and 24/7 customer support is available if you need help.

Gold and precious metals

Both precious metals and cryptocurrency act as a potential store of value, so they are often compared. For instance, in the same X post where he said he was buying Bitcoin and Ethereum, Kiyosaki wrote that he had been saving "real gold" since 1971 and "real silver" since 1965.

Gold, in particular, has long been a preferred store of value, as it's generally considered to be a tangible asset with real-world utility. But not everybody has access to the "vaults outside of Switzerland" where Kiyosaki says he keeps his precious metals.

If you're looking to diversify your portfolio but don't want the hassle of finding a place to store it, Priority Gold is an industry leader in precious metals investing.

Priority Gold has earned an A+ rating from the Better Business Bureau and a 5-star rating from TrustLink. The company offers a 100% free rollover if you convert an existing IRA into a gold IRA, and it even provides free shipping and free storage for up to five years. Qualifying purchases can also receive up to $10,000 in free silver.

To learn more about how Priority Gold can help you reduce inflation's impact on your nest egg, download their free 2026 gold investor bundle.

Private markets

While crypto and precious metals get a lot of attention, other alternative assets still exist. Of course, not everybody has the time to seek them out, which is why you might consider managed portfolios that specialize in private market assets.

With Willow Wealth, eligible investors can diversify beyond publicly traded stocks and bonds through private-market opportunities spanning real estate, private equity, private credit, art and litigation finance.

Minimum investments start as low as $5,000. You can select individual deals or opt for diversified funds, including funds managed by institutional firms such as Goldman Sachs, Carlyle and StepStone.

More than 500,000 members have invested over $6 billion (10) through Willow and the platforms it has acquired.

Private investments can require long holding periods, carry higher fees and result in losses. See how Willow can put your money to work across a wider range of assets.

Bottom line

Ultimately, any of these options could potentially provide you with a better return than a coin that suffered such a large collapse on its first day, but you'll probably still want to do your research to find an investment solution that's best for you.

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