Her Husband Hasn't Worked in 12 Years and Refuses to Help Out. Dave Ramsey Says, 'This Is Now Your Fault. It's No Longer His Fault'
Fri, July 24, 2026 at 10:31 PM GMT+3 6 min read
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Supporting an unemployed partner for more than a decade while trying to raise two children and get ahead financially left one woman wondering whether investing in real estate could finally improve her situation. But personal finance personality Dave Ramsey said the investment wasn't the problem.
The 35-year-old registered nurse from Houston shared her story during a recent episode of "The Ramsey Show." She explained that she and her common-law husband have been together for 15 years and have two children.
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While she works and is studying to become a nurse practitioner, her partner has been unemployed for the past 12 years. She said they're still living paycheck to paycheck, despite her income and owning a mortgage-free home worth about $400,000 that was gifted to her by her father.
The Real Issue Isn't the HELOC
Linda originally called to ask whether she should take out a home equity line of credit to invest in real estate with her father, who had offered to help with the construction side of the business. She also has about $45,000 in student loan and car debt.
Ramsey quickly dismissed the idea.
"I would not pull a HELOC loan to invest with your father under any circumstances," he said. "We don't teach people to borrow money to invest."
As the conversation continued, it became clear that Linda's biggest financial challenge wasn't her debt or her investment plans.
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When co-host Rachel Cruze asked, "So, he just says, 'I want to take care of the home and the kids and I don't want to go get a traditional job and make a living?'" Linda responded that that's true and that she repeatedly asked him to help her out because they're still living paycheck to paycheck.
"I also don't want to be married to a knot on a log," Ramsey said, adding that it's hard to respect "a guy who sits on his butt all day."
Linda added that she has repeatedly asked her partner to find work because she wants to stop living paycheck to paycheck, prepare for retirement and give her children a stronger financial future.
It's Time to Draw a Line
Linda said one reason she stayed was because she believed children should grow up with both parents in the home.
Ramsey disagreed.
"The proper thing to do for the children is to not let this model be in front of them," he said.
He then delivered the comment that became the defining moment of the call.
"This is now your fault. It's no longer his fault because you've tolerated it this long," Ramsey said. "You've got to correct your problem that you created by drawing a line in the sand."
He suggested giving her partner 30 days to find a full-time job or leave, adding that he would have drawn that line "11 years ago." Cruze agreed, saying that healthy relationships require an "all hands on deck" approach when a family is struggling financially.
The hosts also encouraged Linda to seek guidance from a professional counselor or pastor before making any major decisions.
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Fundrise
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For accredited investors looking beyond stocks and bonds, EquityMultiple provides access to vetted commercial real estate deals starting at $5,000, with only ~5% of opportunities passing their due diligence process.
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This article Her Husband Hasn't Worked in 12 Years and Refuses to Help Out. Dave Ramsey Says, 'This Is Now Your Fault. It's No Longer His Fault' originally appeared on Benzinga.com
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